EEEK YOU GUYS I AM SO EXCITED I FORGOT HOW TO UNDO THE CAPS LOCK BUTTON!!!

But no worries, I fixed it.

I am sooper dooper excited y'all.  I'm so pumped.  Like stoq'd!

It's ridicky donkey.

I had opening night of my play tonight!  It went amazingly.  Honestly.  I've never been prouder of my
drama club. We did so well.  It was fantasticisimus!

The play is Anything Goes, and if I do say so myself, we do an amazing-tastic job at being these characters.  I play a drunk French person.  That is literally my role.  I am drunk, and I am French.  My mom thought that I was hilarious, which means a lot coming from her.  I mean, she's my mom.  I like it when she is proud of me.  I have so much nervous energy right now.  It is ridiculous. 

Honestly.
I couldn't love my cast and crew more.  After hanging out with them nearly every day for four months, you can't help but being a big family. It just happens naturally.  I love each and every one of them and they all know it because I hug every single one of them.  Every single day.

SO MUCH ENERGY!!!

Oh, and I'm feeling much better, for those of you who care.  I still have a cough, but hey, everyone is coughing. I am not coughing in solidarity.  I am coughing in a coughing barbershop quartet.  I cough alto.  I took that way too far.

I'll report back soon about everything else that happens.  It'll be a blast.

OH, one funny awkward story to tell.  So you know that guy that I moaned about a few posts ago?  Well, I was talking to him today before the show (he's in crew) and I was laughing and walking away after making a joke at his expense (the only way to make jokes) and I had one of the costume ladies tell me explicitly, while laughing "He's much too young for you."

I nearly died of embarassment.  I had to go hide in the dressing room and laugh quietly to myself for a while.

I have to go to sleep because it is midnight and I still have school tomorrow.  So I love you all and I'll talk to all y'all soon!

I am too tired to tell a joke, but I promise I have a good one lined up.

Love and kisses,

L.

MORE LINKS TO CLICK!!! CLICK THEM CLICK THEM CLICK THEM!!!!

You know how I wrote that thing about glee give a note?

And how if you clicked the link I would give you a place in my government when I take over the world?  Something like that?

Yeah, that still applies.

CLICKY THE LINKY!

CLICK ME I'M A LINK!

But in addition to helping my school win some cashola for music, and you all know how important music is, I'm giving you lovelypoos another link to click.  And you will hear the sound of my voice for possibly the first time.  Grab onto your socks, pants, hats, anything that could be blown off, because I am about to BLOW YOUR MIND.

Click this and follow the sound of my voice.

I appear at I think around the 1 minute mark.  Be forewarned - I was not told that I would be used for filming that day, so I'm wearing no makeup and my acorn hat.  You will see why I call it an acorn hat if you click the link.  You will also see that I'm really bad at improvising. 

But I thought you might enjoy this.  My school is quite hilarious.  I'm proud to be part of the band! Even if we are clumsy.   You will get it if you click the link!  Promise!

That's right.

I'm in the band!

Love and kisses,

L.

P.S. That thing about the squirrel?  Not a lie.  If you click the link, you will know what I'm talking about!

P.P.S.  The pads bit made my think of sanitary pads.  It was awkward, because it is funny, and if you think of that, it makes it funnier.  CLICKTHELINKIFYOUWANTTOKNOWWHATIMTALKINGABOUT!!!!

P.P.S.  I really want you to click the link, can you tell?  Because 1.  I want you to like my school and vote for us for the glee thing, and 2. I want you to see that I'm an awkward awkwarder who likes to awkward and that I'm wearing a hat.  And that I exist.  So, click the links, yeah?

Life Is An STD That Is Always Fatal

Lovelypoos! I'm back!  I'm not dead!  I didn't fall off the face of the earth!  I wasn't eaten by rabid walruses!  I just had a really big history project due, and that took up all of my time.  It won't happen again.  Kidding, it probably will happen.  All the time.  So sorry about that.

I'm going to confess something to you all that I haven't actually confessed out loud, not even when I'm talking to myself.

Prepare yourselves for what may seem like deep-rooted self esteem issues mixed in with some adolescent hormonal moaning.  But don't worry; It's just sleep deprivation.

I'm afraid that I'm defective.  I know that that sounds awful and terrible, but I do.  I have two friends, yes?  I have them in most of my classes, and during PE we sit in the corner of the gymnasium on the mats and talk about stuff (yes, for all of you who are wondering, I'm passing this class with an A, thank you very much).  Mostly the stuff we talk about is boys, because we are girls. 

Now my two friends, both of them openly have crushes on boys, I guess is the way to put it.  Both of them have had multiple boyfriends and they both get boys to like them really easily.

Here is where I feel like I'm defective.  I can't get a guy to like me.  Like ever.  I've had a grand total of one boyfriend, and that was for fifteen minutes in the sixth grade.  I've never been kissed, and I doubt any self-respecting guy has even thought about kissing me, regardless of how horny he was.

And I don't feel a need to always like a guy.  I haven't 'had a crush' since sixth grade.  At least on anyone attainable.  I have 'idea crushes', as in, I love the idea of someone, like a celebrity.  Or I get really attached to a voice.  Or a character in a book.  But not on anyone real.  Does that make me defective?  Or weird?

I am kind of worried that I'm going to end up lonely and alone because I have trouble making connections with people.  I feel like people think that I'm aloof.  I guess sometimes I do act like that.  It's my own fault.  I act aloof and use caustic sarcasm as a way to hide the fact that I have no idea how to act and that I actually am quite shy.

People have said that one of my great qualities is no fear to talk to strangers and a vast knowledge that allows me to relate to anyone.  If only they knew.

Okay, so that was deeply personal, I'm so sorry that I just subjected you to that.

I love you all.  Seriously.

Parting joke:

Why did the dolphin commit suicide?

Because his life had no porpoise!

Love and kisses,

L.

I Feel So Wonderful Right Now

And I really do.  I really truly do.  Mentally.  Physically I've had a headache the size of Kansas all day, and psychologically I feel inferior to the huge pile of winter clothing that is sitting on my floor, glaring at me.  Well, not glaring, since it is just a pile of clothing and therefore doesn't have eyes with which to glare at me.  MOVING ON!

One reason I'm feeling so happy is that I've found a new comedian to love.  His name is Russell Howard and he is BLOODY HILARIOUS.  And British.  Which just makes him awesome.  Case in point, click here.  LAUGH HYSTERICALLY.  "I said no such thing."  What a genius.  Where did I find this guy?  BBC America.  Because I am a loser and I watched TV last night until midnight, watching this comedy show.  And thank God I did, or I'd have missed this guy.  And he's hilarious.  For real.  Click my link.  You know you want to. *Seductive face.*  Oh god, that was so intentionally dirty.  And in related news, in the same TV show, I saw Danny Bhoy, who is a Scottish comedian who is hilarious as well.  I don't have any links for him. But you should look him up.  He's quite funny.

Another reason I'm so happy is that I have ice on my head.  In a lovely little ice-pack called Betty.  Have I mentioned Betty?  (I literally just checked my old blog posts for ten minutes trying to find Betty and I couldn't.  So, I've apparently never mentioned her.) Betty is my ice pack.  She is lovely.  And cold.

Another reason I'm happy is that I've finally eaten.  It was a homemade mashed potatoes, corn and popcorn chicken.  With cranberry sauce!  Nomnomnom.  Now I'm not starving to death.


Another reason is that I realized that my father is a hipster.  He drinks Pabst Blue Ribbon.  It explains all of my hipster tendencies.


And the last reason I'm feeling wonderful is that I've jumped from 19 followers to 28 followers in a week.

I LOVE ALL OF YOU!!!!!

THANKS SO MUCH FOR FOLLOWING!!!!


Parting joke:

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Amy!
Amy who?
Amy fraid this is the wrong house!  I don't know you, either!

Love and kisses,

L.

Harry Potter Pick Up Lines

I know that most of you are Pals of Potter, and are rabid avid members of the DA, so when I found these, I felt I needed to share them with you.  No special occasion, just the mutual love of Potter.

If you don't like Harry Potter, GET THE FUCK OUT.  Not really, I love you, but, you might not get it.  And that wouldn't be any fun.

ARE YOU READY?  HERE WE GO THEN!

Harry Potter Pick Up Lines: Guaranteed To Work Better Than Amortentia!

You must be a Triwizard Champion because my goblet is on fire!

I'd like to get my basilisk into your Chamber of Secrets!

Have you heard of Platform 9 3/4?  Well, I can think of something else with the same exact measurements!

I've been whomping my willow thinking about you!

Did you just use Petrificus Totalus?  Because you just made me stiff!

I may not be an animagus, but I can sure be an animal!

My name may not be Luna, but I sure do know how to love good!

You don't need Lumos Maxima to turn me on!

If I was to look into the Mirror of Erised, I would see you, naked!

Do you play quidditch?  How about taking a ride on my broomstick?

The thought of you makes something vast and silvery come out of my wand...

Why don't I make like Salazar and Slytherin side of you?  (Say it.  It makes sense aloud.)

You don't need Engorgio to enlarge this!

Call me your house elf and I'll do whatever you want without any clothes...

A couple of nights with me and Moaning Myrtle will have to get a new nickname!

Wingardium Leviosa isn't the reason why I'm rising!

You're like a bottle of Skele-Gro, growing me a bone!

And my personal favorite...

I don't know a thing about Merlin's Pants, but I'd love to get into yours!

***********

So there you have it.  I guarantee that these will always, sometimes, occasionally, on alternate Thursdays, you won't get a restraining order, I promise work.

Enjoy!

Parting joke:

Your face.

Oh yes, it is joke enough.

Just kidding!

Love and kisses,

L.