ARGH I AM SO SORRY THAT I AM NOT DOING THINGS FOR YOU!!!!
It's like I've had nothing to write about. Which, logistically, after writing every day for thirty days, makes sense. I took all of my good ideas and used them up. That is what has happened to me. I am a used up paper napkin, a piece of trash in the wind.
It's late; can you tell?
I have state testing tomorrow.
Bad news: it takes up two hours of my life that I could be spending actually learning things that are relevant to my future.
Good news: once I'm finished tomorrow, I never have to take state tests again! YES THANK THE GODS.
Honestly. The questions that they ask have to be able to be answered by those with all levels of intelligence, so that means that if you have half a brain inside of your skull, then most of the questions are an insult to your IQ. Not even a joke, the math that I had to do today could be done by a seventh grader. I could have taken that test in seventh grade and passed it with flying colors.
I just have to console myself that I will never have to take them again. Also, if you do really well on them you can get scholarships to state schools. Not that that is applicable to me, since I don't intend on staying in Massachusetts. Not even remotely close.
It's been raining here for about three weeks now. If it rains any more you're going to have to start calling me Noah and rounding up the animals two by two. Ugh, I'm going to end up tearing my hair out of my head.
My older brother is graduating on Sunday. I don't know what to do with myself. Part of me is really jealous that he is finally finished and can move on with his life and part of me is scared because I'm next. I only have two more years left in high school, and if this year was any indication, they won't be very long years. I miss being little and feeling like minutes were hours. Now it feels like minutes are seconds and my life is just flying by. I always say I can't wait to get out of my town, and I can't, but at the same time I really don't want to grow up. Someone text Peter Pan. I want a one way trip to Neverland.
Hey, at least if I'm there I don't have to take state tests. And that would be a blessing.
Okay fooligans, here's the scoop. I'm going to try a writing schedule. I'll alternate weeks, 1 week with posts on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, and 1 week with posts on Tuesday and Thursday. That way, I'm motivating myself to write and keeping the creative juices flowing. Juices. That is a weird word.
Okay, I need to go to bed. I have tests in the morning.
Shoot me.
Love and kisses,
Jen
Showing posts with label the real world. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the real world. Show all posts
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
The Story of How I Dealt With My First True Asshole
Let me preface this story by saying that I am Jewish, and extremely proud of this fact. I know that the previous statement sounds innocuous, but believe me when I say it is important to the story.
And so it begins.
************
I have never hated anyone before. I am very proud of this fact, that I am in my seventeenth year of existing on this planet and I have never hated anyone.
Well, of course, that all had to change this year.
So there is this guy in my school. His name is Brandon, but it should be Dick. Because that is what he is. We were in the play together, and this is where this all started.
Whenever I would walk past him, he'd go "chu chu", like a train, but he would say it in a manner that sounded like he was saying "Jew Jew". Which I wouldn't tolerate. I point-blank asked him what he was saying a few times, and he'd get all defensive and wouldn't answer me. So I finally just tried ignoring him, because asking him to stop wasn't helping. Whenever he would make a racial comment, I would kind of laugh it off, and awkwardly try to remove myself from the situation as soon as possible.
But after the play ended, he would still do this stupid stuff! At a Capella, he would make comment and make sure I heard them. He even really embarrassed my friend Peter because he included him in one of his 'jokes' and when Peter realized what was going on, he got so red. I didn't know that shade of red existed in this world. It was then that I started to stand up for myself. He was going "Jooo", which is a syllable in one of our songs, but he made sure he was looking at me what he said it. So I looked right back and went "diiiick". He stopped for that day. Win for me.
However, he didn't stop completely. I dealt with that today. Oh, I dealt with it.
Today, I had a horrible headache. Now, if you don't know, I get terrible headaches, which I talk about here, if you want to know more. My medicine has since stopped working and I get horrible, migraine-type headaches a few times a day. If any of you have ever had a migraine, you know what I mean. And then Dick, I mean Brandon, has to balls to walk past me and go "chu chu" like he's a train conductor. I looked physically ill when he did that. Like puke up my guts ill. And we were in a crowded hallway!
After that I was done. I had had it.
I went home and I told my mom what I was going to do. Now, my mom knows what this guy has been doing, and she actually gave me a bunch of comebacks to say to him which were mean and witty at the same time. That is why I love my mother. But I told her what I was going to do, and she gave me some really good advice. That is another reason I love my mother.
So I went into a Capella knowing exactly what I was going to do. And Brandon was there, and he was pretty good because he wasn't near me, but at the very end of practice, he was right behind me and he asked my friend MaryBeth if she liked "juice". And then he said "I could really go for a juice box right now" putting a hell of a lot of inflection of the "ju" part of "juice". MaryBeth, bless her heart, turned around and said "Fuck you" to Brandon. I love her for that. Then he had the ballsack to ask me if I wanted a juice box. That was it. I turned around and went "Brandon, could I have a word with you after a Capella? Thanks." He shut up real quick.
When a Capella ended, he came up to me and was all "Sorry sorry I didn't know blah blah blah". It was such bullshit, y'all. Like I couldn't deal with it. I said to him "I accept your apology but let me talk. I am done with your comments. I have had it." And then he said "If I had known you were annoyed I wouldn't have done it!" (Yeah right. Once a dick, always a dick. He was horrible to my older brother too when Jake, my older brother, went to my school. Him and Brandon hated each other.) But I said "Let me finish. This is the last time. The next time you make a comment like that I will go to the school." And he's all "But you laughed!" And I said "Yeah, because you made me feel so uncomfortable!" And then he goes "Why are you so angry?" To which I replied "Because I was the only one you were doing that to. And it ends now. This is the last time."
Then I walked away.
LIKE A BOSS.
He kind of looked at me and then walked away, like he didn't know what to do with himself.
WIN FOR ME!!!
He'll probably never bother me again. He's just a jerk, and a bully, and a coward to boot. And I put that asshole in his place. I've got two and a half more months and then I'll never see him again, because he's graduating. Which I'm taking as a welcome blessing.
More than anything, this experience has taught me that there are assholes out there, even in my ass backwards little town (I literally live in the boonies of Massachusetts, but I digress). There are people who will make fun of me and hate me because of my religion. They exist, and there are a lot of them in the world, which weirdly makes me even prouder to be Jewish. Jews have been through some shit storms throughout all of recorded history. Most of the world has always been hating on the Jews in one form or another. This hatred, which has lasted thousands of years, makes me proud to be part of this religion. We can deal with this hatred. And we survive in spite of it.
Just like I did with Brandon. I stood up for myself, and told him exactly what was what. If anything, I now know that I am strong enough to take on people who will hate me for no reason other than my religion. And knowing this makes me feel like a better, stronger person. I can deal with assholes. And I can do it on my own. I can take on the world, in my own small way.
Besides, telling him off felt almost as good as if I had punched him in the face, which was my next option. I have very violent tendencies. It isn't good. Or is it.....?
Well, if you've read through this whole thing, I love you to bits and pieces. You just read my first tale of me dealing with the real world. This is a monumental occasion. Thanks for sharing it with me.
Parting joke:
"Dicks and vaginas are kind of like Coke and Pepsi. I strongly prefer one but my dad thinks they taste the same."
-Bo Burnham
(technically vaginas should be vaginae but I'm not one to change quotations.)
Love and kisses,
Jen
And so it begins.
************
I have never hated anyone before. I am very proud of this fact, that I am in my seventeenth year of existing on this planet and I have never hated anyone.
Well, of course, that all had to change this year.
So there is this guy in my school. His name is Brandon, but it should be Dick. Because that is what he is. We were in the play together, and this is where this all started.
Whenever I would walk past him, he'd go "chu chu", like a train, but he would say it in a manner that sounded like he was saying "Jew Jew". Which I wouldn't tolerate. I point-blank asked him what he was saying a few times, and he'd get all defensive and wouldn't answer me. So I finally just tried ignoring him, because asking him to stop wasn't helping. Whenever he would make a racial comment, I would kind of laugh it off, and awkwardly try to remove myself from the situation as soon as possible.
But after the play ended, he would still do this stupid stuff! At a Capella, he would make comment and make sure I heard them. He even really embarrassed my friend Peter because he included him in one of his 'jokes' and when Peter realized what was going on, he got so red. I didn't know that shade of red existed in this world. It was then that I started to stand up for myself. He was going "Jooo", which is a syllable in one of our songs, but he made sure he was looking at me what he said it. So I looked right back and went "diiiick". He stopped for that day. Win for me.
However, he didn't stop completely. I dealt with that today. Oh, I dealt with it.
Today, I had a horrible headache. Now, if you don't know, I get terrible headaches, which I talk about here, if you want to know more. My medicine has since stopped working and I get horrible, migraine-type headaches a few times a day. If any of you have ever had a migraine, you know what I mean. And then Dick, I mean Brandon, has to balls to walk past me and go "chu chu" like he's a train conductor. I looked physically ill when he did that. Like puke up my guts ill. And we were in a crowded hallway!
After that I was done. I had had it.
I went home and I told my mom what I was going to do. Now, my mom knows what this guy has been doing, and she actually gave me a bunch of comebacks to say to him which were mean and witty at the same time. That is why I love my mother. But I told her what I was going to do, and she gave me some really good advice. That is another reason I love my mother.
So I went into a Capella knowing exactly what I was going to do. And Brandon was there, and he was pretty good because he wasn't near me, but at the very end of practice, he was right behind me and he asked my friend MaryBeth if she liked "juice". And then he said "I could really go for a juice box right now" putting a hell of a lot of inflection of the "ju" part of "juice". MaryBeth, bless her heart, turned around and said "Fuck you" to Brandon. I love her for that. Then he had the ballsack to ask me if I wanted a juice box. That was it. I turned around and went "Brandon, could I have a word with you after a Capella? Thanks." He shut up real quick.
When a Capella ended, he came up to me and was all "Sorry sorry I didn't know blah blah blah". It was such bullshit, y'all. Like I couldn't deal with it. I said to him "I accept your apology but let me talk. I am done with your comments. I have had it." And then he said "If I had known you were annoyed I wouldn't have done it!" (Yeah right. Once a dick, always a dick. He was horrible to my older brother too when Jake, my older brother, went to my school. Him and Brandon hated each other.) But I said "Let me finish. This is the last time. The next time you make a comment like that I will go to the school." And he's all "But you laughed!" And I said "Yeah, because you made me feel so uncomfortable!" And then he goes "Why are you so angry?" To which I replied "Because I was the only one you were doing that to. And it ends now. This is the last time."
Then I walked away.
LIKE A BOSS.
He kind of looked at me and then walked away, like he didn't know what to do with himself.
WIN FOR ME!!!
He'll probably never bother me again. He's just a jerk, and a bully, and a coward to boot. And I put that asshole in his place. I've got two and a half more months and then I'll never see him again, because he's graduating. Which I'm taking as a welcome blessing.
More than anything, this experience has taught me that there are assholes out there, even in my ass backwards little town (I literally live in the boonies of Massachusetts, but I digress). There are people who will make fun of me and hate me because of my religion. They exist, and there are a lot of them in the world, which weirdly makes me even prouder to be Jewish. Jews have been through some shit storms throughout all of recorded history. Most of the world has always been hating on the Jews in one form or another. This hatred, which has lasted thousands of years, makes me proud to be part of this religion. We can deal with this hatred. And we survive in spite of it.
Just like I did with Brandon. I stood up for myself, and told him exactly what was what. If anything, I now know that I am strong enough to take on people who will hate me for no reason other than my religion. And knowing this makes me feel like a better, stronger person. I can deal with assholes. And I can do it on my own. I can take on the world, in my own small way.
Besides, telling him off felt almost as good as if I had punched him in the face, which was my next option. I have very violent tendencies. It isn't good. Or is it.....?
Well, if you've read through this whole thing, I love you to bits and pieces. You just read my first tale of me dealing with the real world. This is a monumental occasion. Thanks for sharing it with me.
Parting joke:
"Dicks and vaginas are kind of like Coke and Pepsi. I strongly prefer one but my dad thinks they taste the same."
-Bo Burnham
(technically vaginas should be vaginae but I'm not one to change quotations.)
Love and kisses,
Jen
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