Quote of the Week

Take a shower, shine your shoes/ You got no time to lose/ You are young men you must be living/ So go now you are forgiven.
-The General, Dispatch

Sunday, April 22, 2012

April 22: My Insecurities

I watched a video today, which I will post at the bottom, that made me really think about some stuff.  It was about insecurities and why they don't matter.  In fact, the title of the video was 'Insecurities and Why They Don't Matter'.  Pretty self explanatory, huh?

Anyways, I am... wait for it... extremely insecure.  Now, I know a lot of you must be thinking "Jennelle, insecure?  You are such a silly biscuit for even insinuating that claim!  Go into the corner and think about what you've just said!"  Before things get completely out of hand, let me explain.  I am insecure, and that's... well, that's basically it.  I've explained it.

I have some normal insecurities and some not so normal insecurities.  Want to hear them?


I'm an evil overlord at heart, let me just live out my delusions of grandeur alone with my cats.  Which would make me not alone, but whatever.

Here goes nothing.

My Insecurities

1. My teeth.  I've been self-conscious about my teeth for pretty much my entire existence on this planet.  They are really tiny, and I used to have really huge gaps in my top front teeth.  Braces fixed the top gaps, but I still have gaps in my bottom teeth.  Also, my canine teeth are really prominent and large in comparison to the rest of my teeth, so I look a bit like a vampire, or a werewolf, depending.

2. My weight.  I live in a very weight conscious family.  My older brother is so athletic, and his natural metabolism is so fast that he used to lose five pounds in his sleep. IN HIS SLEEP.  I can't lose five pounds even I diet for a month.  I gain weight just by looking at bread.  I've never really been 'overweight', but for someone who stand 5'1", if you weigh a normal weight it looks like you weigh a lot more, simply because there isn't as much body to distribute that weight to.  Now, a lot of my weight is muscle because I did karate for 12 years, but ever since I stopped I kind of lost a little muscle tone.  Swimsuit season, people.  I want to look good when I go to Israel! There are some hot guys going on my trip!

3.  My intellect.  I am going to try to explain this one without sounding pretentious, because talking about something like intelligence often has the capacity to stray into that area.  I am a know-it-all.  I'm that kid that loves to know that they are right.  I correct people when they say words wrong.  I'm that kid.  But the problem is that while I am intelligent, that intelligence doesn't spread evenly over all subject matter.  I'm very good at languages and history, and a little more than slightly less good at maths and science.  The problem with this completely normal problem is that I hold myself to such high standards that I simply cannot allow failure.  I got a C for the first time ever last quarter.  And believe me, I'm beating myself up more than anyone else is.

4. My nose.  I have been told multiple times by multiple people that my nose isn't big.  It just is big to me.  It's one of those things that I will never be okay with, simply because I can't do anything about it.  Before anyone tells me that I could get a nose job if I so chose, let me tell you how doctors perform rhinoplasties.  First, they have to break your nose and take out the excess cartilage.  Then they reshape the remaining cartilage by shaving it down.  Excuse me if I don't do that to my face.

5.  My fear that no one likes me.  I have friends, friends that would do anything for me.  But with acquaintances, I'm never really sure if they like me or just tolerate me.  Because by all accounts of humanity I can be annoying.  Sometimes I have to look at myself in the mirror and tell myself to stop being such a freak, because I wig out way too much.  I know that it is completely irrational for me to feel this way, but I still do.

I only want to list five because I don't want to bore you all.  But believe you me, there are more.

But that's okay.  It's okay to be insecure.  It's okay to feel awkward in your own skin.  Because the odds are everyone else feels the same way that you do about themselves.  So embrace your insecurities.  Tell them that it's okay.  Tell yourself that it is okay to feel the way you feel.

Then come find me and we can be insecure together.  We'll have a grand old time, I promise.

Here is the video.

Hope you enjoy it and I hope it makes you examine yourself for a second and then feel better about yourself as well.  That's what it did for me.

As always, love and kisses,



  1. i myself also have a heckload of insecurities. pretty much everything, i guess. but this was a really great video, it actually makes you feel better! definately showing a few of my friend this...

  2. That video was so good! I get what you mean, and I have some of the exact same insecurities as you. Being 5'1 is not easy at all!

  3. It's just a part of growing up. We all go through that phase, and we grow out of caring so much about our little 'flaws'.

    There will come a time, trust me, when you feel comfortable with your body, and you will also stop giving a crap about what eggheads say about you when they have nothing better to do.

    And like this guy so wisely said, some people find out little imperfections endearing.

    Food for thought.

  4. DON'T WORRY ABOUT ANY OF THESE THINGS. NOT OF THEM ARE TRUE. Especially the nose part! You have a lovely nose. I would know. I am what might be described as a nose expert.

    YOU'RE NOT FAT EITHER. Not even remotely. Girls all think they're fat or not pretty or blah blah blah. 98% of the time they look totally fine. You look fine. Who cares about muscle tone? I don't know many guys who prefer buff girls anyway.

    Let all of your insecurities scatter in the wind. Have no fear! You are a child of God, and you are a marvelous piece of work in His eyes.

    Ha ha JK there is no God LOL.

    I'm not watching the video because I should be working on my science homework right now.


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