Quote of the Week

Take a shower, shine your shoes/ You got no time to lose/ You are young men you must be living/ So go now you are forgiven.
-The General, Dispatch

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

I Am Literally Death Warmed Over

Now, I pride myself on having a very healthy and robust immune systaselfrhkhjslkdf.

I can't even pretend for the sake of pretending that the statement above is true.

I have always been a sickly child.  It started when I was a baby, with ear infections, and moved on to stomach issues, then lung issues, then sinus issues, then knee issues.  I've just never been a really healthy kid. I got pneumonia twice. TWICE. In two years. That is just not healthy at all.


Where was I? I stopped and watched probably four videos on Youtube, so I'm a little foggy as to what I was - OH! I remember!



But I am. I am properly sick. Like taking a shower took so much out of me that as soon as I was done I lay down and took a nap. My voice is gone, I have these huge watery eyes, and my sides literally ache from coughing.

If I die, it would be a relief from the coughing. Because there is coughing. Oh so much coughing.

I haven't been this sick in years. And what sucks is that my play debuts next Thursday. I NEED A VOICE TO SAY MY THIRTEEN LINES!!! GAHHH!!!!

Maybe I could mime it all. Maybe I could go kill the part of me that thought miming would be a good idea, because mimes are scary and unnecessary.

Maybe I could go to bed, so that I could go to school tomorrow.

That sounds peachy. Maybe I'll do that.

I'm off to go swallow five hundred tablets of vitamin C.  C you all later!

Did you C what I did there?

*begins to laugh like the proverbial drain*

Catch ya on the flip side y'all.

Parting Joke:

Why does it take pirates so long to learn the alphabet?

Because they can spend years at C!

Love and kisses,



  1. Feel better!!!
    Sleep and chicken soup.

  2. Sleep and chicken soup indeed! But feel free to skip the vitamin C - unless you're a super-athlete or have scurvy, it actually has no effect on alleviating symptoms or preventing colds. :)

    (Once upon a time, a "scientist" wrote a book called "Vitamin C and the Common Cold" that had no basis in fact. The end. LOL.)

  3. Nyquil. NyquilNyquilNyquil. I love that stuff. That stuff is beautiful.

    I hope you feel better. And I hope your play goes well. I am jealous that you can do that, because I only ever danced for an audience. I could never, like, talk. Out loud.

    *Shivers with fear at thought bubble vision*

  4. And when I mean "i could never talk out loud" i mean like in front of a huge audience. I'm not a mute or anything

  5. Whoooaaa, that sucks.
    Know what makes me feel better? Nutella + Oreos. Do it. For great justice.

    Anyway, hope you get betterer real soon.

  6. That sucks. I hate being sick. Fortunately, I have an unbeatable immune system. I haven't been sick for a long time. But I don't want to jinx myself.

    I hope you feel better! Take lots of Vitamin C! And get a lot of rest! And...um...I read this article that orgasm helps clear one's sinuses. I'm not implying anything of any kind or anything. Just sorta...throwing that in there. Orgasm helps clear your sinuses. It's a proven fact.


  7. That's sucks! I had nearly the same thing this last weekend. I couldn't sleep for three nights because of coughing. I'm sorry I forgot how to enchant the words I type to give them healing properties, but I still hope you feel better.
    Also, as it turns out, orgasms do not help clear ou you sinuses. Now my bathroom is a mess and my nose is still stuffed up.

  8. Alex, I don't think you're doing it right.

    Also! Jenelle! In case you're interested! The Toble Chronicles has just launched our forums at lizardworm.com/forums. We need to fill it up with interesting people who say interesting things like Gatsby's parties. Will you go and check it out? Just go and introduce yourself and comment on one or two of the discussions. I would be MUCH obliged.

    And if you like The Toble Chronicles, spread the word, huh?

    Are you feeling any better?


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