Quote of the Week

Take a shower, shine your shoes/ You got no time to lose/ You are young men you must be living/ So go now you are forgiven.
-The General, Dispatch

Sunday, April 15, 2012

April 15: 5 Things That None Of You Know About Me

Or at least I hope you don't know.  That would be really weird, considering I don't know any of you in real life.  But the 'me' that I project on this blog, while being 100% me, no additives, no artificial ingredients, doesn't have any of the quirks that I have.  Quirks just don't translate into the written word.  At least, not all of mine.  So here, without further ado, are 

FIVE THINGS YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME

Thing 1: I get stuck on certain phrases that no one but me uses, and that rarely make sense.
One of the phrases that I say - a lot, mind you - is 'Holy Jesus, Mother of God'.  Now, look at that phrase and tell me if it makes the least bit of sense, or even is possible.  Now try explaining that to me.  It won't do any good.  Or, for instance, I say 'that's aces' when something is good, or 'aces' instead of 'okay'.  So 'aces' in my mind means either 'okay', 'good', or 'cool', depending on the connotation.  It's not cool.  I confuse people.  I've also said the unfortunate phrase 'crap on toast' more than once in my life.  Yeah... Not a pretty picture.  But I can't and won't stop saying these phrases. So ha.  Hahahaha.

Thing 2: I am obsessed with finding the right words.
I annoy my friends because I use, according to them, 'really big words'.  Well, excuse me for having a vocabulary.  I like using "big" words.  Here is the reason: they get the job done in one word, rather than eight.  So I can say 'ameliorate' instead of 'to make better'.  Plus, words just sound cool.  The correct word for goose bumps is 'horripilation'.  I have a word of the day calendar, I go on dictionary.com every day to look at the word of the day there.  I love knowing these words because you never know when you are going to need them.

Thing 3: I love finding hacks for the human body.
Do you have sinus pressure from congestion?  Well, alternate between pushing the space just above your nose, in between your eyebrows, and the top of your mouth.  You'll rock your Vomer bone and then the liquid will drain out of your sinuses, relieving the pressure.  You're welcome.  Also, fun fact: you can tickle yourself.  Tickle the top of your mouth.  Guaranteed to be one of the weirdest sensations you've ever felt.  Also, there are pressure points that can get rid of headaches, like the one between your thumb and first finger.  If you have a headache, just probe around in that flesh area until you find a tense spot, then massage away the tension.  Your headache will dissipate as you do this.

Thing 4: I want to travel more than anything else in the world.
I find the world to be this amazing place, full of wonder.  And I won't get to see it if I don't travel.  My life's greatest wish is to see all seven continents, even Antarctica.  I want to travel to as many countries as I can, and help as many people as I can.  I have been given such a gifted life, I feel obligated to give back.  In fact, I want to choose a job that will allow me to travel and help people.  I either want to be an English As A Second Language teacher or a journalist.  But mainly, I want to help.  And I want to write. And above all, I want to see the world.  I want to point to countries on a map with my grandbabies on my lap and say "You see that country? I've been there.  And there.  And there.  And there, there, there, there, and there.  And you can go there too."

Thing 5: I have a loud, obnoxious laugh.
I don't know if any of you have imagined me laughing (if you have, I accept that you are creepy and we'll move on from that) but it isn't pretty.  I have a loud, obnoxious, annoying laugh.  Like crazy loud.  But only to a certain extent.  If I am laughing hard enough, I won't make any noise at all.  Opposites.  What?!

Okay, so now you know some things about me.  I tag everyone who reads this to do the same on their respective blogs.  Put the name of your blog in the comments so that I can read them!

And if you don't want to do it, fine.  Be the party pooper.  It's okay, we all still love you even though you're lame.

Love and kisses,

Jen

7 comments:

  1. #3 - my mind is blown.
    I'm able to control my body in weird ways, like I can suppress sneezes and coughs by raw will power and can negate pain in ways that would make Batman jealous.
    I gotta try out that headache cure though... I wonder if it works for migraines?

    #4 - I really want to travel as well. I've gotten the urge lately. Even to just drive somewhere for a few days and kick back. I really want to do it sometime soon. I want to go to Canada as well, just because it's so picturesque.


    #5 - I want to hear your laugh. Badly.

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  2. I would love to travel the world as well, it's just getting the money to fund it lol!

    And thanks for the headache relieving tip coz I get them a lot

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  4. (Sorry for the delete of the last comment. It just went wrong)
    I want to travel the world as well. Specifically Brazil and India I think.

    Also I have a silent laugh! It drives my friends insane.

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  5. When I saw #3 I immediately tried doing all three things, despite the fact that I didn't have congestion or a headache.

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  6. THE ROOF OF MY MOUTH IS TICKLISH. I'm somewhat uncomfortable now.

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  7. you are a cute geek. u know that? =D

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